If I ask you, “What if you decide to do (X)…?” or “What if (X) happens?” if you’re like most, your initial response will likely be something challenging or disappointing or fearful. We tend to consider all of the terrible things that could come to pass before we realize that there are positive potentials.
My coach encourages me to replace ‘knowing’ with being curious, and this has helped a lot. This knowing can show up as assumptions about something. If I ‘know,’ I generally am not open to learning more, seeing a different side. If I’m curious, about why something happened or what potential outcome it could have, then I’m allowing a new way of seeing it and letting go of my assumptions.
The natural reaction to this is a significantly lower experience of frustration. And frustration is definitely my go-to emotion. But, if I let go of assumptions, I don’t get frustrated (ok, or not AS frustrated).
So let’s flip that around. What if…we consider many positive outcomes? There are just as many potential positives as negatives, we just sometimes need a nudge to remember that.
If you find yourself dreading or worrying about something…and we Highly Sensitives are really good at this, the over-thinking and worrying scenario, what happens if you ask, “What if this turns out amazing?” Or, “What are some good outcomes that might happen?” When I do this, my concern or worry decreases or dissolves, and I’m open to more positivity. My energy frequency also increases, so I’m more likely to see a good result because I’m open to it, rather than ‘knowing’ it’s not going to be good.
There are a lot of things we can’t control, but we can control how we think and feel. Yes, things might not turn out the way we’d like, but if we remove the need for that result, our experience of it changes. A couple thoughts I like are, “If I choose this and it doesn’t work out, I can choose another.” Or “I don’t have any control over this, but maybe it will work out just fine.”
While considering a situation or making a decision, if we think about several positive outcomes, we are less likely to feel anxious about it. And if we visualize the amazing things taking place, we’re in a happier, less anxious place, regardless of the outcome.
So if you’re worried or anxious about something, maybe check in and ask which “What Ifs” you’re stuck on, then see if you can shift those to potential positive outcomes. Some deep breathing and centering exercises beforehand can be helpful, just to allow for the shift to take place. If you’d like to chat about how I can help with this, you can schedule a free consult.
Have an amazing day!