Managing Our Feelings

Have you ever felt like you were ruled by a feeling, that you just couldn’t shake it and it made your whole day challenging? It’s easy to get ‘stuck in a rut’ feeling a certain feeling, and have it impact the way things go for the rest of the day (or week or month!).

Where our attention/intention goes, energy flows. This is a quantum theory premise that has now been confirmed by many scientific studies. Everything is energy, and like attracts like. 

So, if we’re mired in what’s not working, focused on feeling sad, angry, disappointed, unsupported, unworthy, or assuming that things aren’t going to go well, people and events will come into our lives to support this concept and our feelings…to make us right.

Do You See It?

There’s a distinct and powerful difference between the statements (beliefs)…”I’ll believe it when I see it,” and “I’ll see it when I believe it.”  In the former, we’re waiting for good things to come before being ok, before feeling happy or respected or worthy. Our happiness is contingent upon proof that it is so. In the latter, we’re choosing to be happy, content, hopeful, and trusting that all will be well regardless of the past or what it seems like in the present. We’re choosing to create our reality by assuming that it’s already here.

This idea is discussed by the late Wayne Dyer in his book, “You’ll See It When You Believe It: The Way to Your Personal Transformation,” and his other books, and by many, many other authors, researchers and speakers.

We get out what we put in pertains not just to effort we put into a project or our fitness regimen or learning a new skill, but to the energy we send out to the Universe. If we send out positive vibes more positivity will come our way; if we send negative vibes, in the shape of thoughts and assumptions and feelings, we’ll see more of those.

The Frequency of Feelings

Everything is energy, including feelings. All have their own frequency…guilt (30Hz) and fear (100Hz) have lower frequencies than do joy (540Hz) and peace (600Hz). If we’re stuck in a lower vibration feeling, it’s challenging to move past the ‘things not going well’ scenario and bring in positive things. 

This happens, as well, when we get stuck in the ‘what if’ game…assuming the worst and all potential negative results. “What if I try that and someone laughs at me?” “What if I trust him and he disappoints me?” This is an unending practice…there can always be something else to consider that isn’t what we want or doesn’t feel good.

So what can we do to move out of the lower vibration mode when we feel so stuck in the feelings and the beliefs and we can’t see our way out?

There are many techniques that can help, and working with a coach or counselor can help you find and move along on the right path, but here are a few ideas:

~Remind yourself that it’s temporary. All things change…it’s not going to be like this forever.

~Don’t identify with the feeling…just recognize that you’re experiencing it right now, but it’s not who you are

~Ask yourself what you’re telling yourself that’s limiting, and reframe it.

~Change your negative “what if” to a positive…”What if I try it and it’s an amazing success?” “What if I trust him and he comes through for me?” There are just as many positive potentials as negative.

~”Practice” feeling what you want to feel…do something that makes you happy, make yourself smile until it feels more true, meditate and imagine what it “would feel like” to be happy, until your system takes over and you feel happier.


There’s so much focus on the negative in the world right now. Being aware of our patterns and considering our feelings directly can allow us to sit back and create a different experience and a different path forward. I use the focus: acknowledge, allow, feel, release.

If you’d like to talk more about this and getting out of your rut, I’d love to connect on a free discovery call.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published.

%d bloggers like this: